Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Final 2013 Thoughts

Quote of the day!!

I use to use this blog as a daily diary of sort for myself which provided me an outlet to my thoughts and to keep myself focused on the right things. I look back pre-Hashis diagnose I wrote in here at least 3-5 times a week with those intentions. It helped to align my thoughts and with my actions. Keep me moving towards my goals. Well if I look back at the last year of writing it has been sparse and lacks the excitement and passion that I once had. I think I let myself be more consumed with healing of Hashi's than my passion for running and the journey get a bit lost. I got more focused on the obstacle and less focused on the dream/goal. I let my shadow win at times. 

Henry Ford quote

I am recommitting myself to using this blog as I once did. I will funnel my love for running and life in this blog to refine my focus on a daily basis. Focus on all that is good, happy and sunny.

Albert Einstein / Happy Dappy Bits

Find parts of my journey that are exciting me. Focusing on those pieces and highlighting them. No longer letting my past 2 year struggle continue to a weigh in my movement forward. No longer letting the past yuckies get in my way of having amazing runs. Leaving my past struggles in the past. Focusing on all the good that is come both in running, life and my health. 


Sunday, December 29, 2013

Week in Review

=As they said #love by astridtroillet - alinebortone@gmail.com - Gmail

I thought I'd a blog post today. It is has been almost 2 weeks since Kiawah and with the holidays, life has been busy. I was able to get in a good bit of running this week. Just enough to keep fit but not enough to tire me out too much and still allow for recovery from the marathon.

Week in Review

Monday OFF
Tuesday 6 miles @ 8:40 pace
Wednesday Christmas OFF
Thursday 3 mile W/U, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 @ 6:05-6:33 pace with 2 minutes rest, 2 mile C/D (Mini- workout to get legs moving again) Felt tough but good. Glad to hit target which was 6:25-6:35. The first few I got a pick quick and it definitely made the last intervals tougher.
Friday 7 easy @ 8:59 average - First 3 miles were super slow like 9:20s and than I felt great after mile 3 and picked it up a bit in the 8:20-8:40s
Saturday 14 easy @ 8:35 - Legs felt good but I felt a bit tired.
Sunday - OFF (long walk and yoga)

I am happy with the week given the holidays and travel out of town. I definitely needed Sunday off. Glad to have a lazy Sunday, cleaning, taking a walk, and hanging with family.

I would liked to have run more like 38-40 miles but with Monday being in Michigan and with family - I opted for more rest. Rest is best when returning to running. One extra day off this week can only help me at this point.

Week Total - 34 miles

That is all! I am feeling good. I have felt a bit on the hyper side of thyroid things this past week but with no real hard training I think it will even itself out before my next race. I believe that is why I haven't felt super duper in my runs. Also I am bit worn from the holidays and looking forward to returning to an easy training route after the Holidays.

I am taking some time today to think about my 2013 and set some goals for Goals 2014. Keeping my eye the journey and enjoying what is right now.

Yeaaaaaa goals are good and all but a life of happiness is better. Trying to determine my 2014 goals but instilling the fact that next year ...

Monday, December 16, 2013

Kiawah Island Marathon & Failure is the path to greatness

EVEN OUR FAILURES WILL WORK FOR OUR GOOD WHEN GOD IS IN CONTROL OF OUR LIFE: "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths," Proverbs 3:5-6.

As I think about my race this weekend, I am still a bit befuddled by the results and the day as a whole. I felt stronger than every in the weeks leading up to the marathon. I knew my fitness was where it needed to be and I was staying positive all week the week before even when I got sick just 6 days before the race with a gluten reaction to a gluten exposure. I didn't let myself get upset but keep telling myself my tummy would be right by race day. I was super proud of myself for staying so positive. By mid-week, the mummers of the weather were starting take Kiawah runners attention. The beautiful, cool, crisp weather we had been experiencing looked like it was going to take a turn for the worst for one day - that day was marathon day. I ignored it pretty well. Not looking at the weather till the day before and still thought I was going to give my best effort. Not once did I let it in my head that the weather would be a factor in my race outcome. I did decide to go out more conservative in the first few miles but I still had it my mind prepare to chase down the goal time.

When we woke up to go to the car, it was warmer than the day and night before. Ugh! When we started I could feel like I was working harder than I should be and I was struggling for a bit of air. My garmin never picked up satellite and did not work the entire race so I was completely going on feel. I was trying to relax myself into a marathon pace effort. The first few miles felt harder than they should. I kept thinking that once I relaxed into a rhythm the breathing would sort itself out. By mile 8, I was wheezing pretty hard. By mile 13, I was still on pace for 3:24-3:25 as the 3:25 pacer was behind me and I thought I could rally in the second half but nope by mile 14 the 3:25 pace group was swallowing me whole. I could not stay with them past mile 15. I started really feeling the heat and the humidity as my body was soaked. My shorts were sticking to me and I could not drink enough water and feeling like I wanted to vomit. I knew my mile 18, there was no rally in me. It was just going to be pushing as hard as I could without falling apart too badly. 

I finished in 3:37:30. Dazed, confused, and a little bit sad. 

This race was not my day but I know that there is a greater plan at play so I walk away knowing I controlled what I could control and the rest was out of my control. 60-70s and high humidity in the middle of winter just took more of me than I had. 

I know the times were overall slower and there were lots of PR casualties from the heat/humidity but I didn't want to be one of them. 

Oh well I will live to fight another day! I am healthy and my body is strong so I will rest and build back up for my next marathon.

At bedtime, I was talking to my wise son about my race. I said "Mommy, didn't get the time I wanted but I will keep trying".

He said to me some pretty amazing things. First he said - Failure is part of progress. Yup this is coming out of my 10 years mouth. Than he told me when he was getting bad grades at the beginning of the year and failing tests. He kept trying and look at where he is now. I was like "you are right Christian - you are doing so great now". He said that was because he failed and than he kept trying. I said so I had to fail to get better. He said no if you fail, you try your best the next time and you will do better. Such a deep talk with my 10 yr old, wise, deep thinking son. Than he paused and said this - "Failure is the path to greatness". Oh I love this sweet thing. I was like where did you hear/read that. He said I just made it up in my head. Than we laid quietly next to each other while he was doozing off and I got up to leave and he said Mommy, when I finally become an author - I am going to write all my stories about you being the main character and I am going to tell everyone that I got to be here because my mom taught me to Never give up. 

WOW - I feel like an angel spoke to my heart. Children's heart are so wise and open. They have not yet started seal themselves off from hope. They innately know what we as adults shut out when we experience disappointment. We adults make things much complicated.

Maybe my dream isn't about me at all but it is about the legacy I leave for my children. What they will learn and know in their hearts by me pursing my passion, taking risks, staying positive, failing, keep trying, staying open and hopeful. 

What I know about failure is that it is such an important part of success. No one daring greatly that is successful has not failed and risked their hearts in the process. Once you close yourself off after not meeting a goal, you have lost the dream. 

"Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm." #WistonChurchill #Quotes by @Candidman

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Taper Magic

Relax and enjoy life quote via www.Facebook.com/SilentHymns

Funny how you feel every emotion possible during a taper. Well I do anyway. My first week of my taper was heavy with excitement and confidence. My second week totally took me by surprise I was struck with a bit indifference that lead it's way to an over pouring of overwhelming amount of deep feelings. They were not negative feelings but rather like a year in reflection that brought up emotions I hadn't dealt with. I was literally crying for 3 days straight. Not sad crying but just feeling crying. I was not sad in my tears at all. Feeling gratitude so deeply that I was overwhelmed by it. If I sat with my thoughts for even a second than a steady stream of tears would follow. I am thankful for the friends that listened to my tears last week. That emotional wave was replaced with a peace and contentment that I am sitting with going into the last few days of the taper. I feel very low key and confident with my race plan so there is no need to continue to think about the race. Just enjoying what each day of the taper brings. There is still much resting and relaxing the needs to take place before I am ready to toe the line this weekend.

I ran a 7 mile easy run yesterday and I feel like I was floating. My legs and my attitude during the run made me feel closer to being ready that I had in weeks so that was a very bright spot of the week. It is always something you hope you are going to feel and sometimes in the second week of the taper when you are still a bit tired you think OMG, I sure hope I feel better next week. Oh and when you do - you sit back and take a deep breathe - ah Taper Magic.

Enjoy the journey.