Standing up again

Wow I can't believe that it has been almost a year since I was writing in here.

I was pondering to myself about how can I an reignite the fire that burned so brightly for so long. This dream has been weighted down my health dilemmas over the past year.

Do I even want to chase this dream anymore is a big question I have been asking myself?

I am pretty sure I do because I can't stop thinking about it or picturing myself achieving it. The vision is still there. It is the first thing my brain locks on to when I wake up in the morning or when I go to sleep and want to think of something I really want.

The thing my brain wants to dream about it running free and strong again and running my dream race where I feel so darn good and floating on air and so much emotional and love in my heart.

That is what pulls me. It is what weighs on me, It's what my hearts wants. It is what I can't seem to let go of.

Am I suppose to let go of it? Is it that what the saying let it go and if it was meant to be it will find its way back to you.

Well how do you let go of something that calls to your heart, soul and mind. The fills your mind when all is quiet. It literally naws at me.

I let go of my goals for a time being but my dreams are still an every present knocking that is like saying rest, do other things for a while but please do not forget about me. I need love, attention and nurturing if I am to come alive again.

This is what my dream is telling me. Remember Me. Mend Me. Nurture Me. Grow Me,

Please, Please, Please don't hide me or hide from me. I am still here! Forget me not!

I seriously thought I could take a month of running and free my mind of this dream. Focus on healing and just being. Of course a week later I am running. Slowly but I am running. I am not going very far but I am running. Sometimes it feels so good and sometimes is doesn't. With the running comes the dreaming..

Can I get back to where I use to be? Can I run better than I use to run? Will I ever feel that light effortless stride that felt so good to me? Will running feel easy to me again?

My goal is to unearth my dream, let the voice of it be stronger than the doubts and fears that have threaten it.

Try to listen to the whispering s and follow the feel of it.




Thank you for reading!