Thursday, June 7, 2012

More life and less running

I think the business of life these last few weeks has keep me so busy that being all inspirational has gone by the way side. I get moments on a run when I am thinking all these awesome thoughts but once I get in the door they are lost in myriad of mommy duties and I never really have a chance to get back to my deep thoughts.

The transition with having the kids home for the summer has gone better than I was preparing for. I took a chill pill and I think that helped. I am not trying to do everything. I get my runs in, chill in the AM with the kids, maybe we get out in the afternoon or maybe we don't, maybe I clean or maybe I won't, maybe I will hit the grocery store or maybe I won't, maybe I take them to pool or maybe I won' get the jist, right I am just taking each moment and day on how I feel rather trying to be super mom with a big list of things to do and the feeling of being overwhelmed becaIuse I am running around all day. Yeah this is the summer of the chill pill, go with the flow, relax and let go.

In fact to illustrate my point, yesterday, Joey, my daughter of 6 had what I call summer hair where her and I never got around to brushing it out. hehehe C'est la vie!

Yesterday was National Running Day - I decided to "Carpe the hell out of that diem" with an unplanned double run. What also really inspired the double was the Seattle-like weather pattern we had yesterday. It was most pleasant running weather we have had in this part of the country in months. I had to cease the day as it is unlikely to stay for more than 2 days so DOUBLES - So awesome!!!

I also am very excited about my new running partner!! She is so awesome and I think we are good balance for each other. She is previous colleigate runner and was on the Olympic Trials training circuit when injuries derailed those efforts. She is now a mom and has not run competitively since just runs for fun and building back the mileage. We have a good easy vibe running together. I think it is really going to help her & I get miles in together. Woo hoo!! Cranked out 9 easy miles this AM @ 8:37 pace.

Some of know I ran a race this weekend. It was more suppose to be just a hard effort not 100% effort given I was not tapered and came off a 2 week high block in addition, I had done no race specific work to prepare the race so the effort was all on general fitness. Goal was to go in to practice pacing and racing skills. I knew my coach did not want me near PR effort for the half but honestly in the back of my head I was like hoping and thinking I would PR huge. I mean the work I have put in for the last 10-12 weeks should put me in PR territory. I had that PR plan in my head. How humbling life can be! hehehe I bombed the race! I mean bad - hehehe I went in knowing it was not a PR course and coach did not want me to run a PR effort but I thought I was so strong I could handle it. Let me first state I can't read fricking elevation charts and have no idea what a hill on a chart actually will feel like running. The course started with a very steep downhill - coach told me very firmly not to use that downhill. I had to run very controlled while I watched what seemed like half the runners in the race use the downhill wildly past me. I had to be patient and control the downhill decent. At the end of the downhill something clicked - I will be running up that bitch of downhill starting at 11.5. I thought Fuck in my head but tried not to think about and just set into a steady pace. I realized about 3 miles in that I did not feel great at all but rather sluggish. Than a series of more steep hills starting around mile 5-8. The bummer was the downhills were so steep and curvy you couldn't use the downhill to gain back what you lost on the uphill. I had manage to keep my spilts pretty even and pick off all those runners who took that downhill fast but around mile 10 I was starting to struggle myself and than it hit me that in about a mile I had to start up that mile and half climb to the finish. I just got overwhelmed and disappointed that the PR in my head was slipping away. I think having focused on getting a PR was scuh a bad way to approach this race cause as soon as that slipped me fingers I was pretty upset and didn't really push as hard and sort give up before I even hit that hill. At the finish, I met with a few gals that I chatted before the race and found out the hills also crushed their time hopes - one gal had run 1:30 6 weeks before at another half in Raliegh and only managed 1:39 on this course and a gal that I had hoped and trained for 1:36 finished jsut 45 seconds a head of me 1:42. So I wasn't too dishearted and than I found out I was 1st in my age group and 10th women overall which totally changed my perception of the course and my run. I did get a little upset though and my coach quickly pointed out that given my high mileage my body was not prepared for 100% effort and that is why he did not want me at 100%. Ah - Live and learn - Listen to your coach and not think you are above his plans and recommendations.

I am learning though and this journey is teaching me so much about myself and about life in general. I love this path and so so so thankful for everyday - good and bad that I get to be on this journey. Yes my faith will be test, yes, there is a voice sometimes where that voice in my head says you won't make it, every step I am taking sometimes seems like lost with no direction, yes the struggles I am facing my take the wind out my sails sometimes and sometimes they knock me down by I am not breaking. Just have to keep going, Just keep being strong, Just keep pushing on..

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