I think that living a in world like Baxter Village makes one think you have to be friends with everyone. For those that don't know what I am speaking of this, Baxter Village. Let me take a moment and give a clear picture of this world. It is a beautiful planned community (think Pleasantville meets the Truman Show) in South Carolina. In this community you have everything, pools, parks, elementary school, YMCA, library, small businesses, shops & restaurants, & planned activities. All this great community comes at a small price, your neighbors are everywhere and they know a whole lot about you. There are social circles to navigate carefully through so that you don't end up being part of the gossip which I am sure is impossible to avoid.
I have spent 3 years trying to be a friend to way too many people. I came from Seattle, where people are relaxed, live & let live attitude, kind but they keep to themselves. I am not sure if the climate is why people generally keep to themselves but in general unless you are real friends you aren't chatting it up with strangers or acquaintances pretending to care. Seattle peps keep to themselves and the people that their friends & family. When we moved to South Carolina, I was overwhelmed with outgoing and friendly everyone is here. People here stop to chat and include themselves in your business without reservation. Being the happy and outgoing person that I am I thought I had to be like this and open myself of up to every neighbor in the community. What I realized in this 3+ year journey is that you can't be friends with all these people. Yes, you can be kind and caring to them but not true friends. You have to create boundaries and only allow people into your heart & mind that are going to be true.
True friendship and the kind to value is something that takes love and attention. It is a two way street where both people love & care for each other. Not one person does the caring and the other person does the taking.
I realized as I go on this path to pursing my dreams that I need to only surround myself with true friends. True friends that believe in me and my dreams. Life is too short and valuable to let false friends come into your heart and harm your potential and dreams.
A friend is someone who understands your past, believes in your future, and accepts you just the way you are. - Unknown
I once read that you had to stand guard to your mind & heart. Allowing in only those people have the capacity to extend the friendship that meets your standards.
Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend. - Albert Camus
I am lucky and thankful to have some true friends that help me to dream and believe in myself.
I am most thankful for my soul-mate, my forever friend and love of my life, my dearest friend & love & husband - Nick :-)
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